Forums! The Musical

LordCretin

Lordy be away with the faeries snorez... snorez.. mmm... nummzzz... ubbah... bokkah... gloreezzz... Caoimhin and Paulie come rushing through, petals and stabilizers slipping all willy-nilly as they feverishly pluck skins from their sundae fruits. The lads stuff Lordy's ears full of nannas. Unca'! Un...

LordCretin

Paulie, we's gotta wake up Unca'!
I know Caoimhin... let's try sticking nanas in his ears.
Paulie, bro', you come up with the bestest ideas.
Wee! Wee! Wee!

LordCretin

(seat springs spranging) (brussel emissions spouting) (plant'n pie giggling) (a Lordy a groaning) Oo-er! I've just stumbled back from me annual foray to Caerphilly, to Auntie'n Unca's digs for Yuletide din-dins. (leans back and rubs his belly) NummY! Whatashame I can't share Auntie's roast parsnips ...

LordCretin

The Lads are as grown up as any shamrock and pudding would be. An I wuv em forrit! In a little corner of my mind we are forever on the porch of the new Veggie Patch, by the beach on the Isles of Scilly, thoroughly slurping through dreamily scrumptious Knickerbocker UberGlories. (Caoimhin and Paulie ...

LordCretin

huGGlez from an ol' foo'

LordCretin

Foxxy! You knew it was mah birffday, Awww... the Cretin feels all cwtchy-cooed huggly-wooed from your birthday dropped call-out. Wee! Wee! Wee!

LordCretin

!!! REACH AROUND !!!
(flailing petals, stabilizers and arms grasp Sally)
!!!

huGGGlez

!!!
(Lordy and the Lads tap dance on a Foxy head)
Wee! Wee! Wee!
(a sheep lies upside-down and baa-haa-haas in background)

LordCretin

...

...
The Cretin's own pulse has been slowly improving, Foxysall.
Cardiff beats 0n
Wee! Wee! Wee!

LordCretin

Hee, hee, Unca' Lordy! We's a trio! We wanna tanks alla Paracites for lettin us tap dance on yors heads an watchin over us grow up inna world a fun-funz an keepin us Rainy Days Jars filled up real good! An speshul tanks to Auntie Sally (Caoimhim and Paulie wrap their petals and stabilizers around Sa...

LordCretin

It looks like Paradox has passed over to the Undiscovered Country of coding retirement. (My only foray into computing language was BASIC, from a century foreign to Millennials - Bless 'Em!). And so before the forums too, dream a lullaby immemorial, I thought Lordy would come full circle by returning...

LordCretin

(Caoimhin and Paulie go Wee! Wee! Wee! for the Sun shining day. They decide to free a Rainy Day Jar and head for the beach)
Aww! They're good lads, so they are. I think I'll sneak on ahead of them to arrange for Gwynfor The Ice Cream to surprise them with a Knickerbocker UberGlory

LordCretin

:deadsheep: Spiff is hosting an in-game Chat Party on 24 July at 6PM EST/Eastern Standard Time :sheep: (3 October) Sorry I missed that message Sally - it was a case of blood loss and severe anaemia that had my brain'n body a-quivering and landed me in hospital for a total of 10 pints transfused in. ...

LordCretin

Noffink! Bwa!Ha!Ha! (The Lads wrap their spotlessly clean appendages 'round Auntie Sally an' squeeze out teh huGGlely cwtchy-coos) I started off by going to a small rock club down by Cardiff Castle, for a punk revival night. Young bands are bringing back (proper!) the power of punk, but with less of...

LordCretin

Lordy has to use up his Annual Leave and has the month of March off.
(Justin Time forra Zmobie Appoccylapsed)
Wee! Wee! Wee!

LordCretin

Happy BearRated New Year's to all youse too!
Wee! Wee! Wee!

Wuvvy-dovvy cwtches,
Lordy and The Lads

LordCretin

RoKK'n RoLL!
(Lordy and The Lads shuffle their buns and get jiggy with The Musical)
Wee!
Wee!
Wee!

LordCretin

That explains the echoes of a jolly robotic voice singing Sweet serenades to Lemonade.
Wee! Wee! Wee!
To the Z! Z! Z!

LordCretin

Wee!
~huGGlez~
My 2019 resolution is to bring joy-joyz to the world by goin' barefoot all year-round, wi' bacon wrapped 'round my toes.
Wee! Wee! Wee!

LordCretin

Arr! I be Chumbait, I be and I be the proud owner of a pair of platinumfish!

LordCretin

(Caoimhin and Paulie wave to Auntie Sally) Typical of the Cretin, I mixed up the dates. I'll still be there to be sure, possibly distracted. We're hosting a play at work, but Grokly's Shindig'll be in the wee hours which affords me some leeway. In any case, The Lads are squirmin' wi' teh eggsitemenz...

LordCretin

Gobby has invited us all to a Grokly memorial on 29 September, from US Central time 9PM, via the Facebook group page, Paradox! The Musical. My own reply: Wee! Wee! Wee! Unca' Cretin'll be pullin' oot a' 'a his Groklinite treads from teh display case an' Caoimhin'n Paulie'll be hostin' a n'er before ...

LordCretin

I never did get 'round to fixing my home internet, but I will be dropping by on quiet work nights when my half-sensical sleep deprivationzzz philosophicate this side of understandable.
Wee! Wee! Wee!

LordCretin

(Caoimhin and Paulie chuckle'n wave from The 'Patch / WC Fields snorts another beer and wonders what the fuss is about)

Wee!

LordCretin

LordCretin

Sure an' begorrah 'tis teh day fer teh green, so it is, so! John Bull may nay know it so, but teh Taffies west o' Offa's Dyke hold it true to teir hearts an' yer's truely'll be joinin' tem fer a pint'r two(ish)!
Happy St Paddy's Day t'ye all!

LordCretin

'tWAS suppose t'piddle down bukkets a day ,bud teh sun be shinning summick magnyficant an ol me is off forra walkies inna park. Wee111 Mah 'ickle bro' from Canada is coming over in June and sis', me'n himself are off to stay in Valentia Island in Ireland for a week. We all stayed there in the 90s, w...

LordCretin

I's a BIG BOY now
Seventh Paraversary
THE sticker for me

My web access remains sporadic for the time being. On the plus side, this here Cretin has to use up his annual leave and so I have some days off this month and the whole of March.

Wee!
Wee!!
Wee!!!

~huGGlez~ all 'round!

LordCretin

Ho! Ho! Ho! MeRRRy Christmas from Wales to the foXX an all of you! I'm on the nightshift and I'm giggly with anticipation! oo! oo! I thought I heard Santa's jingly jangles at midnight, but it was just some passing junkie yanking my chain. He piddled on past my gate, once I called out, "Happy Holiday...

LordCretin

(whispers:) it's gone all spooky quiet, these wee hours.

WE HAD KASABIAN TONIGHT AND A LOUD NIGHT IT WAS!

Just waiting for the Stone Sour tour to turn up.

LordCretin

Boo! (stomps onna ground) ow! ow! Should not 'a done that, what with my foot'n all. (blows kisses and praises to his foot) A trojan ate my home pooter. Dang thang ate it and ate it real good. Riddled it with cantankerous nasties it did. And just to be rude, the wee deil slipped past my defences by h...

LordCretin

Auntie Sally,
You naughty!
I was watching your telly adventures on Bob's Burgers the other night and...
YOU NAUGHTY!
A cheeky imp is you! Harr! Harr! You made me laffz0re with your cheeky boundary pushing improprieties.

LordCretin

Hey, hey cowboy! I hope your studies have served you well. (pokes his mangled memory cells, but cannot recall how long it’s been) Contrary to what we’re all told growing up, post-educational studies is not the end-all-be-all, so if it has not worked out for you, then that’s cool and if it has… then ...

LordCretin

More terror, this time in London, starting on London Bridge. London is about 2 or 3 hours east of Cardiff. A van has plowed through pedestrians on the bridge, then at some point 3 men with knives got out of the van and went on a stabbing spree, killing and injuring people. A police officer who may h...

LordCretin

Cardiff is getting ready for its biggest event this year, the European football championships. I've worked some big events, but this one takes the biscuit. The amount of money being spent on the set-up and security is staggering. There are certain parts of the city where local residents (who don’t h...

LordCretin

Cool! 18 FB friends in and ha! I came to the conclusion at 8, that it would be impossible to keep up with. One of the guys laughed when I said that and replied, "Yer fekk'd now bra', Facebook is gonna take over yer life!" As for who played Manchester on the night, I immediately thought - but it woul...

LordCretin

Kevin be cool, thankyou. I did log onto the games just long enough to show a presence. Paradox was the first game I played, where I would be missed and I did not put enough thought into saying that I am OK. Manchester is something like a 3 or 4 hour drive north of me. On the night in question, I was...

LordCretin

Ho! Ho! jupy! The Wezza and me use yo throw back some richt michty concoctions. But I told him beforehand, if we throw back 2 gallons 'a cider and smoke a half-dozen spliffs inside a' two hours, then I can guarantee, I'd bring it back up. So - it was Coors Light for me (and a few spliffs to be sure)...

LordCretin

Summer's onna way. w00t! w00t! My bud Wez, in Barry town, (Go, go! Gavin and Stacey) has a big back garden shed and teh f00l has only gone and transformed it into his own personal pub. Wee! Wee! Wee! We had had a grand ol' night on Sunday. A mate I haven't seen in some time joined us, along with Wez...

LordCretin

Hey jupy!
(Lordy and The Lads leap about the forums, dropping ice cubes down the back of everyone's trousers)

Ho! Ho!
They're not ice cubes!
They're diced reaper peppers!

April Fools!

LordCretin

I smells me St Paddy's Day approaching.
The weather in Cardiff has been rainy, but it looks to be drying out just the now. So give it two more days and I shall be in a beer garden down the bay.
Sure, 'tis a pint 'a teh black stuff be beckonin' me.

Nummies!

LordCretin

0o-eR!
Sir!
(shares a toast of absinthe-California Thunderbird Wine boilermakers)

LordCretin

Wee!

It's... (gets distractz0red)

oo!
'Allo Z!

Today be Welshie Day - St David's Day! I'm off out to dance among the daffodils and sup a pint or two of Brains. In celebration of Z's new digs, I'll also be trying a pint of something unknown to me.

Wee! Wee! Wee!

LordCretin

Careful there froggy foXX! If you keep eating all the paradoxical knobs, we won't be able to access any of the rooms.

(muffled giGGleez)

~ ribbit... ribbit... ~
~ ribbit... ribbit... ~

Hee! Hee!
The lads say hello.

~ Hello! ~
~ Hello! ~

LordCretin

Wee! Wee! Wee!

(Lordy runs through teh forums nakerz, flinging choccy treats in all directions)

Hmm, guess I shouldn't not have used melted chocolate for that

Happy New Year!

LordCretin

cOWOWOWOWOWb0000Y!!!

Ah hopes your sstuddiees are going well!
Either way, i wish you well.
eXPAND yer horiz0ns.
'Merry Christmas dUUUde!!
(Caomhin and Paulie wave Wee! t0 shameepette dolc)

LordCretin

Wee!

Merry Christmas!

Caoimhin and Paulie are all Happy-Happy Joy-Joy with festival frivolities and have opened up The Veggie Patch for holiday munchies, so so drop by.

Wee! Wee! Wee!

LordCretin

I'll likely be unable to make it on-line tonight, but The Lads will be there. They want to say goodbye and have been busy putting up some memorial messages in town.

LordCretin

Good bye, Grokly!

The Lads and I will miss dancing on your head.

Love Lordy, Caoimhin and Paulie

LordCretin

(Lordy stops fondling his calves long enough to notice a hint of Eastern European accent emerging) oo! oo! Have you been skinny dipping in the Danube yet? Are you hungry? (slaps his thighs and laffz0res) Have your tastes converted to any new cheeses? I heard it was 25 cents for a seat at the opera h...

LordCretin

Umm...

...the Kiwirrkurra Community in the Gibson Desert?

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